You’re Not Being Cringe

…Thanks to this collab with Rossignol. Their slopes-inspo’d collection includes jackets, goggles, and even a shiny new pair of skis. See you aprés pitch. 

In order to capture Gen Z, sports need to emulate K-pop fandom’s sense of belonging, says Substack writer Michael Coen in “Disruptive Play.” By turning fans into co-owners of the story, you win them over for life. However, some of us are already held hostage by our sad teams for life. 

Get Your Kits Off Festival was a movie. The festival encouraged Liverpool fans who also happen to be makers, creators, crafters, and designers to get their kits off, a la the ancient adage “get a fit off.” Season Zine chronicled the event here.  

Filipino driver Bianca Bustamente is challenging societal expectations of motorsports drivers. And she’s been doing it since she was three years old, when she got her first go-kart. Bookmark this one, she’s gonna be big. 

YouTubeTV and ESPN are probably not going to make up anytime, because the former is offering a $20 credit for subscribers. It isn’t automatically provided, because, why would it be? Since I’m a good friend, here’s how to get it. Meanwhile, streamers like Netflix are fighting legacy media. 

If you ask me, we’ve gotten a little too comfortable telling people when and how to feel embarrassed. A few weeks ago, this Vogue article, which details how embarrassing it has become to “have a boyfriend,” set the internet on fire. Then, I saw the below post, which made fun of the initial article (I think), but brought up some interesting points about the athlete empowerment era and how it shapes our fandom for teams.

But the general sentiment—the thought that people will find something you do humiliating—is creeping into every corner of our existence. Here’s the hard and freeing truth: no one is paying that much attention to you or me. If you aren’t interested in a life full of diehard fandom (the heartache and the triumph, if you’re lucky enough to have the latter) and loving as hard as you can (boyfriend, girlfriend, theyfriend, situationship, and everything in between), I’m afraid I must ask what you believe the point of it all is.

The comments on the player empowerment graphic offer many interesting takes on what is and isn’t embarrassing. But they basically fall into two groups, summarized by this interaction: 

I can see both sides to that, though I lean more toward hitching your wagon to a team and sticking with it; if your favorite players leave, bam, you just got a second favorite team. Regardless, none of what we do should be considered embarrassing. It’s hard enough to get through the day. On your deathbed, are you going to think, “It took overthinking every day of my life, but ultimately I won…I was the least cringe.” I sure hope not!

As I mentioned a few months ago, Jared McCain isn’t cringe for dancing whenever he wants; he is free. Steph Curry belting Benson Boone in a flatbrimmed hat isn’t embarrassing; it’s who he is. Search “[sports league] cringe” on Twitter or BlueSky, and you’ll see accusations that just about every person involved in sports is cringe. It’s “The modern NFL is so cringe,” “Jayson Tatum is corny,” “Sue Bird is cringe,” “This rivalry is fake and forced.” 

I’ve seen a few posts on various social media platforms that claim sitting in the nosebleeds is embarrassing. I disagree. Not only is it completely fine, it all becomes part of your story, even if you’re Ant Edwards. 

This theme of policing everyone’s actions to determine whether they're humiliating or not calls to mind a film that is probably now considered “cringe”, even though it was critically acclaimed at the time, and it had me bawling my eyes out. “Everything Everywhere All At Once” was all about how nothing matters. Optimistic nihilism makes the world go round (at least for me it does). It’s the notion that everyone around you is struggling and we have to fight through it together (and with kindness). 

It also calls to mind my favorite A$AP Rocky quote of all time (click and scroll the post below for the full quote). Because oftentimes people say it in the context of being a “try-hard.” When Russell Westbrook wore a skirt for the first time, everyone said he was “trying too hard.”   

If everything is cringe, maybe nothing is cringe. And to worry about whether or not you’re being cringe (via crafting the right aesthetic or attempting to be something you aren’t) might just be the cringiest thing of all, baby! 

Since today is 11/11, I’m guessing that at both 11:11s (am and pm), some kind of portal will open, and out of it will come the number one recruit, suiting up for your favorite team. If it’s not a transfer portal, maybe it’s a portal into the unknown, where all your dreams are waiting to come true. Anyway, you should know what you’re going to wish for. Here’s what I’m thinking. 

I’ll be wishing for some form of resolve between the WNBA and WNBPA. I’ll be wishing for a restart for the entire internet. I’ll be wishing everyone reading this wins $10,000 unexpectedly, and also each one of you shares it with two friends. I’ll be wishing the worst team in college football (aka my team) somehow rejoins the Power 5 ranks, and private equity doesn’t succeed at stealing college football as a whole. Also, for another Heisman-worthy performance from Fernando Mendoza this week. And finally, more games like the Gotham FC’s upset over KC.