… Our guy put out the word he wanted to see 150-mph serves, and Peloton was there to make US Open dreams come true. It was predictably a vibe. Jared doesn’t know this yet but next time I’m going with him.

After Texas’s huge win against Ohio State, head coach Steve “Sark” Sarkisian swerved Holly Rowe on air, and the internet did not like it one bit. Holly seemed like she didn’t love it either. The good news is that our pesky old friend and former colleague Daniel-Yaw Miller was there to experience the historic comeback and document it all. He wasn’t alone in capturing Arch Madness. Also, KD’s got an arm.  

We finally have our trailer for what I’m hoping is our next Best Sports Movie, “Mr. Irrelevant.” It does look pretty good, but I wish they didn’t tell us the entire plot in the trailer. Back in my day, you had to pay a nickel and go to the picture yourself to find out the plot.

Yesterday we crowned some new champs. Congratulations to Team USA who won their fifth consecutive gold medal in the FIBA Women’s World Cup. And congratulations to us because the WNBA season is back this Thursday. Congratulations to Ben Shelton for getting to the final of the U.S. Open, and congratulations to future us, who will see him win one someday.

Brief story: When I was in college, my then-boyfriend-now-husband lived with our school’s quarterback in a humble rental, their rooms separated by a sheet they tacked up on the wall. Now, quarterbacks—and some non-QBs too—are living like this. For some of them, these aren’t even their main abodes. (Imagine that, seven-figure college town pied–a-terres) And, by the way, the homes are so nice, I’d happily live in a sheet room in one of them.   

The NFL is officially back, and I have to say I think this season will bring all-time fits. Although big pants have been “back” for a few years now, based on the fact that every single jock in America is doing big pants, we can officially say the slim fit is dead. I’ve compiled some of my most notable — not necessarily my favorite, but deserving of mention for one reason or another — looks for you from Week 1, but they don’t all involve big pants. Some of them feature big shorts.  

Lately when I laud Joe Burrow for an outfit I hear a Boomer voice inside me saying, ‘maybe he should focus more on football’ and I have to bury that deep down. Because of course he cares about football more than clothes, and also I don’t actually care if he likes clothes more than football — but intrusive thoughts are a real biotch. Anyway. Here are his big pants. 

I wouldn’t say Colts wide receiver Alec Pierce is wearing the biggest pants in the world, but they are probably technically at least bootcut. Here’s his ‘80s coming of age romcom fit (positive).

Jalen Hurts went big pants, bigger shirt. Which I find compelling. And this isn’t an outfit I’d wear, or recommend that anyone wears, but I do love when someone does something a liiiiiittttttle different. 

Bucs tackle Tristan Wirfs has my favorite fit of the week. It’s a masterclass in transitional weather effortless chic. And he could easily play a middle-aged divorced woman who lives in a beach house in a mini series (also positive).

The Ravens aren’t all in my more favorite or least favorite, but I’m fascinated that they are all dressed for different weather and occasions. Best big pants of this bunch are Jaylin Hawkins and Chidobe Awuzie. 

Travis Hunter (looking big himself after having put on some muscle ahead of this season) with big capris, and I respect the heck out of him for that. 

And I know it’s a random add, because she doesn’t play in the NFL, but shoutout to this denim arrival fit on Trinity Rodman, which features big pants, little jacket. 

Anyway, this song, which has been a recurring vocal stim of mine for quite some time, is now officially old.

I had a very sporty weekend. At one point, in my living room, we were rocking a three TV/Monitor situation. Between FIBA World Cup hoops, college football, the first NFL Sunday, and the US Open finals, there was simply no time for anything non-sporty. 

But the highlight of the weekend was probably OffBall’s US Open Women’s Final watch party with Mejuri.

Genie Bouchard was slinging drinks, I was doing numbers in the photo booth forgetting I needed to come up with three photos every single time, Aryna was smashing her racquet, the addresses of some very lucky winners were collected for a special Mejuri giveaway, and Elena Rybakina barely cared that she won at all. It was perfect. 

If you missed it, we’ll see you at the next one. And Genie, please come back!