The WNBA Draft Was A (Sports) Movie

…Who just barred visiting fans and non-Michigan residents from buying tickets to playoff games. No April In The D for you, sorry! 

Even in his downtime, Skip Bayless can’t stop arguing. He took on 20 Lakers fans at once to debate who the best Laker of all time is, because isn’t that always everyone’s favorite conversation?? 

Adidas and Kith are dropping some sweet soccer heat. Streetwear legend Ronnie Fieg gave us a lil taste in a promo video and in photos, and so far we know for sure it will feature a streetwear take on the Adidas Predator Mania shoes. 

A gender reveal that didn’t start a bunch of fires? We can get behind that. Reds outfielder Jacob ​​Hurtubise’s wife threw him a post-game pitch, and he hit a dinger to reveal they’re having a baby girl. That kid’s gonna have one heck of a swing.

Serena Williams says she is done with new business ventures, but do we believe her? The GOAT opened up about the cost of taking the sports and business worlds by storm and says she sometimes misses time at home. She has accomplished pretty much everything ever, so maybe she deserves a break.

If you were a WNBA draftee, last night was a movie. 

Actually, the story really begins years ago, around the time this tweet happened. 

The stage was set, the exposition was solid. Paige had a destiny to fulfill, and it was to be the first overall pick in the WNBA draft.  

INT. A big building in NYC - DUSK

Photographers mount cameras to tripods. Fans and journalists file in, donning their favorite players’ jerseys and WNBA-issued press badges, respectively. The energy is absolutely buzzing. Tonight will be the night their lives change. 

The draftees take to the orange carpet in their show-stopping fits, the pressure grows, they can taste it in the back of their throats.  

HAILEY VAN LITH (still tired from an early morning, while being interviewed) 

“It’s a funeral, babe. It’s a college funeral.” 

INT. The Media Room - A FEW MINUTES LATER

Cathy Engelbert paints a picture of our conflict with her pre-draft presser. She talks about the new deals with brands like Coach and Ally and how the W raised capital ahead of the game, before it was cool. The Unrivaled shade (the everyone shade?!) ok conflict! 

Journalists type, type, type away as they await the selection sound.

EXT. The entrance of the big building in NYC - A FEW MINUTES LATER

Georgia Amoore arrives with her stylist, who also happens to be Russell Westbrook. She’s in a custom Honor The Gift fit. 

INT. On Stage - JUST AFTER

The clock ticks. Cathy approaches the podium. 

CATHY ENGELBERT

“With the first pick of the 2025 WNBA Draft, the Dallas Wings select Paige Bueckers.” 

PAIGE BUECKERS

“Tonight is about being present. Being where my feet are.” 

Up next, at number two, is French phenom Dominique Malonga (the one they keep comparing to Wemby) to the Seattle Storm. 

She’s moved by the growth of basketball in France, and this moment means the French have arrived. And she’s ready to change the game. 

From there, it’s rinse and repeat. It’s Kiki on stage. It’s Aneesha holding a jersey up. Then Saniya. It’s Kaitlyn Chen, who was drafted to the Valks, from the audience. It’s all the players, wrought with big dreams of realizing their WNBA-filled destinies, see their resolution. Tears are shed, and familial hugs are exchanged, and each player gears up for the next chapter of her life. 

FIN

From the vets and the rookies, current WNBA players were absolutely lit to welcome their new teammates. 

Dijonai has said she’s been ready and waiting for the moment they called Paige’s name. She tweeted so quickly, she clearly had it in the drafts. 

Fellow Dallas hooper (that’s still weird to say) AD also showed love to Paige. 

Notre Dame alum Marina Mabrey, who may or may not be super excited for the Sun’s season next year, did show love for Notre Dame draftee Sonia Citron. And she didn’t even need words. 

Meanwhile, in New York, where picks are few and far between (that’s what happens when you win a championship), Stewie patiently waited for the Liberty to finally get a pick. 

The Mystics had three first-round picks, and their current roster can’t wait to get their draftees to the DMV. Shakira, Slim aka Brittney Sykes, and Aaliyah Edwards all kinda popped off about the Mystics’ picks. 

While other players, like the Storm’s Lexie Brown, stuck with a simple story post of the team’s IG. That caption, though, goes hard. 

And Sydney Colson and Kiah Stokes ratted Alysha Clark out for just generally being emotional on draft night. 

…How down bad are they?! Molly Morrison ranked NBA fanbases from least down bad to most down bad. See where your team ranks. 

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